Posted: under Friendship.
Embarrassing moments are a two edge sword. Often times and embarrassing moment can be humorous. More often then not embarrassing moments are painful. Sometimes in embarrassing moment can be humorous and painful. But no matter the type of embarrassing moment, one usually remembers each and every one.
Through my life’s travels and my upbringing I have tried to live by a set of values that fit my lifestyle. I lived and worked in a world that was pretty basic. You said what you could do and then he went and did what you said. There aren’t any long job application forms to fill out. Simply go to the job site in on the piece of equipment that you hired on to operate after the proper instructions from the foreman and go do the job. It really is a simple guy use system. One simply takes everything at face value, and only changes if one does not do what they say. It does not take an Einstein to see if a man is a journeyman or not.
So, as with my construction life is my private life. That is to say, one must be truthful in everything. I’ve had those moments where a favor was done, but not totally appreciated. It really isn’t a bad feeling. It is more like a disappointment. Everyone’s had those moments where something is happening, then you were disappointed. It didn’t change that minute. It didn’t change that hour. It did not change the day, or the year. Yet, everyone remembers those moments. I’ve had my share of those kind of experiences.
Remember my opening line of today’s blog? That part about two edge sword….? I was never comfortable in the part of the grateful person. It was much easier for me to be a giving person than it was to be a receiving person. It is not like I did not receive things through those years. I certainly was a recipient of many good things in my life, not the least of which was the act of friendship of my two friends in Alaska for which this whole three-part piece is about. I just found it easier to give than to receive. I also found it easier to be judge and jury, magnanimous, and a bunch of other things when you’re on the giving side. When one is on the receiving side, the rules do not change they just become harder to control. Especially when one uses the rules to make others squirm. I think the saying, “As you sow, so shall you reap” comes to mind.
I wish I could say why I did not call my friends upon receipt of the wonderful package that they sent me. In retrospect I wish that I would have called as soon as the box arrived. I am completely aware that I did not call. I am completely aware that I should have called. I am completely aware that I failed all of my tests. Either your honorable, or you’re not honorable. As I type this today I am humbled by the grace and goodness of my two friends Jackie and Seth. These two people have done me a service that can never be repaid in kind. But rest assured, if ever given the opportunity to return a favor of any kind to these people that I would leave no stone unturned.
Actions speak louder than words. My actions are an embarrassment to me. That double edged sword is cutting a broad swath to cut me down to being a humble, thankful. and embarrassingly grateful individual for their kind actions.
Nov 19 2008
Posted: under Friendship.
The subject of work is a relative term. I have had jobs that I called work that were easy. I have had jobs that were hard, but I did not necessarily called them work. In the case of my friends work it is just what it is,…work! I am sure that it involved many trips back and forth from the storage area to their home to accomplish the task. It also involved multiple trips to the state licensing bureau. The couple had to make trips to an insurance office as well as a Park and Sell. One cannot forget the trips to the automotive parts house to purchase a battery for the pickup. I have a complete itemized list of all the expenses that it took to make something like this work. The list was as I thought it would be…. long and expensive!
Although my pickup was relatively neat. I cannot say that my trailer was as neat. The picking up and sorting of personal items of a friend has got to be weird. I know that the couple wondered why I kept some things in that little travel trailer. Yet, as I received a package from them in the mail and looked through the contents of that same package I came to realize that these friends sent what they thought was important to me. It would seem that they knew me well. I had mentioned several items that I knew to be in the trailer and for them to be on the lookout. I told them that I was mainly interested in personal items, technology items, and photographs that I chose to leave in the trailer for the next time that I returned to Fairbanks to go to work. The end result of my wonderful package was I know that these people took care to do a favor for me and that I do appreciate and most likely will never ever be able to repay that favor in-kind.
As I write this blog entry today my friends are traveling through Canada on their way to their home in Arkansas. I could call them and tell them what I have written in my blog entry today but that would mean I would have to refocus my embarrassment for not being as appreciative of the box package that was sent to me from my friends in Fairbanks, Alaska. My embarrassment stems from the fact that I received a package in the afternoon and opened it immediately but did not inform my friends the day that I received a package. I spent the evening, going through the package looking at the mometos that were packed away with such care. I really did marvel at how well all these personal items were packed. I received my White boots. What a special treat! I gave up wearing those boots about 10 years ago, because I got so fat. I couldn’t lace my shoes. As soon as I saw the boots. I got out my leather conditioner to clean and oil my boots so they would be ready for any thing that Texas has to offer. The pictures are already in a safe storage spot. My Microsoft ergonomic keyboard was sent to me. This keyboard, as well as all the items in my care package, just seemed to captivate me. Each one took time out of my day. Each one reminding me to call my friends and let them know that the package had arrived until finally. My phone rang, and Jackie was on the other end of the phone.
How does one go about describing an act of a good samaritan that provides a myriad of good experiences to feel happy and one glowing act that kind of mottles all the good feelings into one red faced moment of burning embarrassment? More on that tomorrow…..
Nov 14 2008
Posted: under Friendship, Health and Fitness.
Since I was diagnosed with cancer in February of 2007 I have had a lot of things to be thankful for in my life. Not the least of which was my chance meeting with a new employee of a construction company that was employing me as well. As I remember it it was a nice spring day we were working in a subdivision in the North Pole area. It was a busy construction site. There were four or five, 10 wheel and dumps lined up waiting to be filled by an excavator. Timing was essential to make this job work correctly. While we were waiting for the excavator to start in the early morning hours the new employee came up and asked for some advise on how to deal with this new work site. So I proceeded to instruct her as to how I would attack the worksite and the process of getting loaded, getting out of the area, and dumping without making the excavator wait anymore than is absolutely necessary. On and aside…. I remember making a mental note that day that I thought it was interesting that once advice was rendered that this new employee actually used the advice that was given.
Several years pass while continuing to work with this same employee. Through those years, I got to know a person who was very sincere, very trusting, very giving, and quite good as a truck driver. The last year that I worked for this construction company I started to get headaches during the workday. I don’t think that there was a day that we worked together, that she did not ask me how I was feeling. She showed a genuine concern for my well-being. I forget how we got to have supper one night at their home, but I remember eating a pot of beans that were very very good. We did this several times. Plus, we ate out at a restaurant a time or two and it was always fun.
I missed the whole 2007 season of construction work because of my treatments. This employee kept in contact with me through e-mails, letters, and phone calls. The treatments were slowly completed. Calls from friends continued to come weekly. I received a card from the whole crew, wishing for continued recovery in my quest to conquer cancer. Then one winter day I get a call from this employee. I was informed that they were traveling in to the area looking for trucks to purchase for a friend of theirs who was in the construction business. They had hoped that they might be able to stop by and say hello as a pass-through. I was more overjoyed than surprised. But surprised, nevertheless. What is special to note at this time is that this employee was experiencing stomach cramps all the day. She was hoping against hope that the longer she waited the better she would feel. We talked for a while and then we went to a restaurant and had some fish. It was so nice of them to come and visit me. My son, Little Detailer, has lasting memories of that day. We took pictures and Kellen speaks of them often.
Well, time passes and I made the decision not to go back to Alaska for work. It really wasn’t a problem except for the fact that I had a small inventory of things still left up in Fairbanks that needed to be managed. I could do it myself if I purchased a ticket to fly to Fairbanks. That would cost $1000 or more. Then I would have to procure lodging, meals, and transportation, while in Fairbanks. That would be at least another $500, if not more. The cost to fly to Fairbanks is prohibitive, because the items that I need to manage are worth approximately the same cost as flying up to Fairbanks, if I get them sold…? But no matter what …I need to move these things and be shut of them.
What is embarrassing about this story is the fact that I cannot remember exactly how it came to be that this couple was going to take it upon themselves to manage my small inventory of things. The most likely thing that happened is that this couple offered to help me but I may have asked as well. I truthfully cannot remember. The bottom line of this story is the fact that this couple took it upon themselves to help an individual in a time of need. I received a box a few days ago from this couple with items of my life that I cherish. The packaging was so neat. Every item in the box was wrapped neatly and safely. What everyone doesn’t realize (maybe some do) is how much work this little favor really became for this couple. More tomorrow……
Nov 13 2008
